Watching Studio60

As a follow-up to the recap, here are some memorable lines from the Sports Night episode “Dear Louise …” Did I miss your favorites? Share them in the comments.

Casey: If you’ve had half as much fun watching the show as we’ve had doing it, well, then, we’ve had twice as much fun doing the show as you’ve had watching it.

Dan: If you wear something blue, you get two dollars off a giant blue margarita.
Casey: You know, I make a pretty good living. I can actually afford to wear what I want and pay full price.
Dan: I’m not promoting the economic upside as much as I am the opportunity to drink something giant and blue.

Casey: Hey, Jeremy, we’re going to this place called El Perro Fumando, where if, what, you wear a thing, then something else happens for two dollars less than it would’ve before.

Jeremy: El Perro Fumando?
Dana: The Flaming Dog.
Casey: Smoking Dog.
Dana: Not the Flaming Dog?
Casey: The dog’s not gay.
Dana: I wasn’t suggesting the dog was gay. I was suggesting the dog was on fire.
Casey: He’s not smoking on fire. He’s smoking a cigarette.
Elliot: He’s smoking a pipe.
Kim: He’s smoking a cigar.
Dan: I say he’s gay.

Dan: How do we know the dog is a he?
Casey: “El Perro” is masculine.
Dan: Sounds like Dana’s translation has him leaning another way.

Casey: We’re the best, okay? The very best.
Dan: Yeah?
Casey: Well maybe not the best. But we’re pretty good.
Dan: Right.
Casey: I put us easily into the top 30 or 40.
Dan: Okay, this isn’t helping me.

Dan: I can’t write!
Casey: What are you working on?
Dan: Red Wings/Flyers.
Casey: All right. Let me see. (Reads off screen) “The Flyers played the Red Wings in a hockey game last night, and they won four to three.”
Dan: You see?
Casey: This is more serious than I thought.

Isaac: My 16-year-old daughter is dating a Republican in her class named Chad.
Dana: Chad’s a 16-year-old Republican?
Isaac: That’s right.
Dana: I didn’t know 16-year-olds had party affiliations.
Isaac: Chad was just elected president of the Connecticut Young Black Republican Caucus. He has a 3.9 GPA. He is co-captain of the Lacrosse team. He plays the French horn and does volunteer work at a crisis hotline.
Dana: Sounds wonderful.
Isaac: Dana, did you hear me? He’s a Republican!
Dana: A lot of folks are running in that direction these days, Isaac.
Isaac: Yeah? Well, I don’t want ‘em sniffing around my women.

Casey: Listen, Dana told me you were a little down about the verdict in your trial, so I just wanted you to know I’m not gonna do any jokes, I’m not gonna give you a hard time.
Gordon: I appreciate it.
Casey: So this party at Gracie Mansion must be going pretty late.
Gordon: Yeah, we’ll catch the tail end of it.
Casey: Do you think the mayor’s gonna chew you out for so spectacularly blundering the case?
Gordon: I don’t actually work for the mayor. I work for the U.S. Department of Justice.
Casey: And a hell of a year you guys have been having.
Gordon: You know, Casey, I won’t deny this hasn’t been my finest hour, but there’s really nothing you can say that’s gonna rattle me. I’m just happy to be here, happy to be talking to you, happy to be having sex with Dana every night.
Casey: You know, it really wasn’t my intention to discuss any Dana-related matters. No, I was just reading this New York Times piece on the forensic evidence, the ballistics match, the eyewitnesses, and the 78 hours worth of wiretaps, a portion of which included the defendant saying, “I killed him. I killed him. I killed him dead,” and was wondering what the heck a fella has to do to get thrown in jail on your watch?
Gordon: Well, how ’bout I run you through an IRS audit and we find out?

Natalie: Guys, on page 66, halfway down in the NFL injury report, it says, “Collins is expected to miss practice this week, the result of a bulging disk.”
Dan: Yeah?
Natalie: There’s a typo on the Teleprompter. They left out the “s.”
Casey: “Collins is expected to be sidelined a week to ten days with a bulging di — ” Uh oh.
Dan: Whoa, that’s a big 10-4.
Casey: My next line in the script was, “Let’s go to the videotape.”
Natalie: We might have gotten some phone calls.

Sports Night, ABC, Dear Louise, memorable lines